The Differences
I haven’t been married before, so I don’t have any first hand experience to compare with. However, I have attended weddings in the UK.. So I will base my comparison with those experiences.
In the UK, as with most Western nations, a couple may opt for a traditional church wedding, a private venue or a simple trip to the registry office. For those who get married in a church, it is quite typical for the individual performing the ceremony to also be ordained and able to register the marriage not only religiously, but legally as well.
In Japan, things are a little different. The process for legal marriage is the responsibility of the city ward office and includes some filling out of various documents. In my case a British man marrying a Japanese woman, there were additional documents and verifications required.
Of course couples marrying in Japan can also have a ceremony, be it Western style, Japanese style or even just a meal with friends and family, but there is no avoiding the ward office, as this is the only place where the marriage can be legally registered.
The Ward Office
As expected, it’s a busy place. Many people visiting for a myriad of reasons, not only a place to register marriages, but also for changing addresses, paying taxes, dealing with My Number card issues, plus various other day-to-day tasks.
The carpet is worn, the seats not so comfy, the air stale, the toilets… not so clean.. and a cacophony of voices and automated number calling machines.. All in all, not what you would call a particularly romantic space. With that being said, it was still a very special moment for us.
There was a slight and brief confusion over my documents, which was to be expected. After all I am British, so my documents aren’t the same as the Japanese ward officer is used to, and they were many. I had to provide originals for copy, translated copies (which my wife kindly and expertly did on the computer using a PDF editor), a passport form to write all my details in Katakana (Japanese text), along with a few other bits.
We submitted our self filled marriage registration form, which of course could only be written in Japanese, which has caused ourselves some confusion as to what our names are now, as Katakana doesn’t exactly match English Latin script.. We also had to provide the details of two witnesses.
No Ceremony?
We will be having a meal and drinks with friends soon to share our celebration.
For our own private reasons, we decided not have a big ceremony. However, after the ward office we went out for our first meal as a married couple and enjoyed some astonishingly delicious yakiniku at a lovely independent resturaunt in Ogikubo.
We did enjoy a very special day at a wedding photography studio where we dressed in traditional Kimonos, my wife had her hair and makeup done by a really friendly professional kimono specialist and we had many photos taken. They kindly allowed us to bring two friends and use our own cameras for some sneaky early shots, while we await receipt of the professional ones.
So, you could say our ceremony is being completed incrementally, thus extending the period of celebration! For the two of us however, the celebration will never end!
A Unique Perspective
So, this post is not to serve as a guide or report on a typical Japanese wedding, but to provide some what of a unique perspective for a foreigner marrying a Japanese national in Japan. And also serves as a life update for those who read and had wondered why this blog has been so quiet for a month… We have been a little busy!
Maybe I will post some of the photographs when we receive them from the studio..
Thank you for reading! <3
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